Chapter Two - A Dream Is Realized

I reported for duty at the church, as ‘green’ as they come. After meeting a fellow who identified himself as the Second Assistant Director (2nd AD, for short), I was sent to wardrobe and fitted for a United States Border and Customs Guard uniform. It was the first of countless police, detective, military and authority figures I would play.
This was my first time on a full movie production set and I soon found out about the erratic way that time passes. There are hours and hours of waiting followed by frantic rehearsals and then more takes of each scene. Then usually more hours and hours of waiting and the process is repeated until you hear the words “That’s a wrap.” And that means you can get your paperwork signed so that you will get paid and you can go home. I knew absolutely nothing of the code words, special language or customs that would eventually become so familiar to me and probably an annoyance to friends and family when I would throw them into my everyday speech. I still refer to a coffee or lunch break as a ‘sammy break’ as they are called on movie sets in Canada.
As the morning wore on, I found out the shooting title for the movie was “Never Trust An Honest Thief” and its stars or principal actors were Michael Murphy, Michelle Finney, Alfie Scopp and my jaw still drops when I think about this legendary actor, Orson Welles. It turned out that this was Welles’ last film and most disappointingly, it is usually not included in filmography listings of his extensive and often brilliant and influential work. Welles’ classic ‘Citizen Kane’ always shows up on just about everyone’s lists of the most influential films.
There were huge issues with this production and I had no idea how troubled this movie was at the time. The original director quit the morning I showed up on set over creative differences. I actually witnessed that confrontation with one of the producers and watched him roar away in his jaguar not realizing what had just happened.
Orson Welles was quite ill and was playing a Sheriff of a small US border town during the re-election campaign of Richard Nixon. Georgetown was redecorated and I will never forget walking down the main street and seeing it looking exactly like an American town with election banners and American flags. Because of his health, Welles would spend most of his times in a large air conditioned limo; his meals and script and anything he wanted delivered to him. When it was time to shoot the scene, he would be driven to within a few feet of the set. He would be helped from the car. Then he would get into position. The first assistant director would call, “Quiet on the set. Roll sound. Roll film. Background action!” And then the director would call, “Action!” Welles would grumble a few lines almost inaudibly, rolling his eyebrows and jowls.
At this point in his career, any attempt at artistry was gone and he had truly become a caricature of himself in earlier days. The director would call, “Cut!” Welles would then climb back into the limo and the crew would set up the next scene or another ‘take’ and after about an hour or two, it would start all over again.
To see the amount of equipment, the number of vehicles and mobile dressing rooms, the sheer number of people, crew, actors, extras and craft services that are required to make a feature film is simply mind boggling. You soon develop an appreciation for anything that makes its way into a cinema or onto television.

There were a couple of other really notable coincidences that occurred on this my first set. Michelle Finney, the female lead, had been on a Canadian TV show called Razzle Dazzle when she was about twelve years old. My grade six school class went to see this show filmed and I was absolutely smitten by Michelle and so to be in a film with her was almost as big a thrill as working with Orson Welles.
On Razzle Dazzle, there was a clown and on the day we visited the show a rope trick went wrong and the clown suffered a cut over his eye that halted the show for a few minutes while they bandaged him up.
One of my fellow actors on this day was playing a Canadian custom guard and he introduced himself as Jack VanEvera. I knew that the famous Canadian comedian Billy Van, was really Billy VanEvera and I asked if they were related. Jack said that yes indeed Billy was his younger brother. As we sat and chatted he asked me if I had heard who was in the production and I told him the names. When I said Michelle Finney he reacted and said that was great and he had to go and say hello because he had been in a show with her many years before. “What show?” I asked. Jack answered that he was the clown on Razzle Dazzle.
There is lots of time to kill as you wait for your scene and plenty of it to chat and talk about your life and things in general. Jack told me that he had been in the navy in WW2 and had played the trumpet.
That immediately rang a bell and I asked if he might know my Uncle Bill. Without hesitating he said, “Bill Vineham the trombone player?” and I said yes. And as it turned out he and my Uncle Bill had been very good friends who had played in the Navy band and traveled together during the war. And that was yet another serendipitous coincidence.
I worked on the set for two days and my big scene occurred on a section of road at a border crossing with a cross hatched barrier gate. The scene starts with me talking to people in a car as they cross the border. I open the barrier gate for them and let them drive through. Suddenly I see a car on the hill flying towards me at high speed with police cars in chase. I stand waving my arms to try to slow the cars down but they fly past me crashing through the barrier as I react in fear and astonishment and jump out of the way of the vehicles.
There was very little acting going on, on my part. The stunt men were driving at probably 140KM per hours and were fish tailing the cars as they passed within inches of me. It was terrifying and my reaction was absolutely genuine.
The film languished in obscurity for several years and was finally released as an HBO production with the title ‘Zen Business’ about ten years later. I had given up hope of ever seeing myself in this film so it was great to finally see it on HBO but it was a horrible muddled mess and it is no wonder that the director and Orson Welles had their names removed from the credits.